32 books & shows to keep you company this winter
It’s coming up to that time of year where I start getting ready to nest and hibernate for most of the winter. This time around it’s mainly due to the COVID-19 numbers that are slowly inching upwards in my area. But a few years back it was due to my raging rheumatoid arthritis that made a lot of things I used to enjoy just fucking suck.
Like a chilly day.
Before, I’d wrap up in scarves, woollies, boots and be revitalized when the cool breeze hit my cheeks. But when I was at my worst, no amount of layers, gadgets or warmers could prevent my fingers and toes from losing all colour. Nor could they keep the painful burning sensations away that the cold sent deep down into my bones.
Regulating my body temperature became a full-time job and wrestling in and out of clothing was my part-time one. All while I was begging and pleading for a small reprieve from the pain that wouldn’t leave me alone.
It took a lot of effort to not fall over when I walked and at times lifting my leg to take one small step up or over something would send silent tears down my face that I tried to hide behind sunglasses.
Luckily, my worst times aligned with winter and sitting on my couch under blankets, books and cats while watching something was an easier option than dealing with slippery ice, uneven snowy ground and frigid temps that intensified my pain.
Thankfully, last winter wasn’t as torturous for me. I was able to actually go for a hike, once, in lots of snow and I didn’t even need a nap afterwards like I suspected I would. But since I’m taking immunosuppressants to help me live with rheumatoid arthritis, going out to mingle with crowds of people who believe that their flu shot gives them immunity against everything and therefore eradicates their need to continue to wash their hands or sneeze into the crook of their elbows, isn’t high on my priority list.
So wintertime is the perfect time to stay indoors for this cozy seeking introvert.
While I was making sure that all my indoor twinkle lights are working, and I’ve got a healthy supply of beeswax candles at my disposal, I went through some of the book, show and movie recommendations I've offered you over the years. I was surprised by the amount of it all and I hadn't even gone very far back in history. So, I figured you might enjoy a shorter (by a little) list of books, shows and movies I’d still recommend now that some time has passed.
Maybe they'll keep you company and bring you some comfort and joy as they have for me.
Or maybe you’ll realize that I could always use more suggestions of what to read and watch and you'll hit reply and send me some gems. (Hint, hint! I'd love it if you would.)
Now, these are in no particular order, I’ve simply numbered them in the hopes that it makes it easier to read.
And I'm sure I've left off some great things that I've read and watched but these ones are the best and on the top of my mind at the moment.
Without further ado, here are 32 books & shows to keep you company while you're hanging out at home this winter.
Let's begin with a few books...
1) How to Live Well with Chronic Pain and Illness by Toni Bernhard. I read this shortly after being diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis. I was reluctant to read this because I didn't want to live well with pain and illness, but I'm still grateful that I got over myself. This book had some gems that helped me feel less alone. It's also a great resource for caregivers. It might even help you improve relationships with people who are and aren't, dealing with chronic pain and illness of their own.
2) They Both Die At The End by Adam Silvera is a beautiful and tragic tale that will make you question how you might spend your last 24 hours on Earth. It may encourage you to make some changes so that you can make the most of your life while you're still living it. It’s a young adult book that I highly recommend for teens and adults.
3) The Awakened Woman: Remembering & Reigniting Our Sacred Dreams by Dr. Tererai Trent. This is a book full of hope.
4) When this mama needed to do some self-parenting recently (which I’m still doing) I found Adult Children of Emotionally Immature Parents: How to Heal from Distant, Rejecting, or Self-Involved Parents by Lindsay C. Gibson. I felt SO seen while reading it, and that alone was healing. But it also helped me bring a new level of understanding to my relationships with my parents, sister, even my husband and son. It helped me show up in ways that work better for me and I've actually seen improvements in some of these relationships that I was just about ready to give up on.
5) In Burnout: The Secret to Unlocking the Stress Cycle, the authors, Emily and Amelia Nagoski, write about ways to avoid, well... burnout. It’s an easy read and helps you appreciate that while stress isn’t going away, how you respond to it is something that you do have some control over.
6) How to Lose Everything by Christa Couture I can’t lend you my copy because page 54 is covered in my tears and snot. Canadian friends, this book is available now. USA & UK friends, add it to your pre-order lists because it doesn’t come out until early next year for you. When recommending this to a friend recently, I said “I’ll warn you now that it may feel like someone is stomping on your heart while someone else is trying to give you a cuddle.” She immediately ordered it.
7) Emergent Strategy: Shaping Change, Changing Worlds by adrienne maree brown. This one is life-giving as we go through the many transitions that have been happening over the last few months. It's been great at lighting up parts of myself that were beginning to darken.
8) Salt, Fat, Acid Heat: Mastering the Elements of Good Cooking by Samin Nosrat and art by Wendy MacNaughton. I fell in love with this book long before I watched Samin Nosrat cook her way deeper into my heart on the show of the same name on Netflix. But this book is informative and will naturally make you want to up your game in the kitchen.
Now let's get to some shows...
9) Giri/Haji - OH MY GOODNESS! I just watched this last week and immediately afterwards grieved that there won't be a season two. I can't remember the last time I whooped and hollered and screamed out in delight and surprise during more than one episode (but especially the last episode). I always enjoy a show with layers, and this one's got 'em.
10) I May Destroy You - Michaela Coel is brilliant and this show may leave you gutted and examine all the ways that consent shows up or isn't present in your life.
11) The Black Godfather - You'll see how a man, who seems to prefer staying in the background, became and continues to be, a major influence and mentor to people who you've probably heard on the radio, or watched in movies, over the last few decades. This was the first time I ever heard the name Clarence Avant, and this documentary makes me want to get to know him even more. He takes great care in fostering relationships that are a win for all parties involved.
12) Skyladder: The Art of Cai Guo-Qiang - I fell in love with Cai Guo-Qiang, and was amazed at what he creates with the use of gunpowder, fireworks, and smoke. So much beauty! His love for his family is contagious. Let me know if you tear up a bit, as I did, at the ending.
13) The Chef Show - Its description "Writer, director and food enthusiast Jon Favreau and chef Roy Choi explore food in and out of the kitchen with accomplished chefs and celebrity friends," didn’t really excite me when I read it, but once you get past Gwyneth Paltrow in the first episode... it’s SO good!
First, there’s a lot of great looking food, and second, it’s filled with people who really enjoy what they do. Roy is a chef who was an advisor on the movie Chef (which I loved) and helped Jon Favreau look like he knew what he was doing in the kitchen. And surprise, Jon can actually cook!
I found it adorable that we often get to see this accomplished movie director, Jon, wander around a kitchen asking Roy to check his work and try to impress him while continuing to be inspired by what Roy and other chefs create. I’d happily sign up to be a sous-chef to some of the interesting guests that are on the show… but not Gwyneth.
14) Unbelievable - The subject matter was triggering and difficult for me, but yelling at the screen during particularly frustrating times helped me to blow off some steam.
15) Watch Dolemite Is My Name when you want to watch people go after what they want and have some fun while they're doing it.
16) I whole-heartedly enjoyed the movie Knives Out. It's smart and witty and I was only distracted by the colour of Daniel Craig’s eyes a few times so I was still able to follow along.
17) Shrill - I’ve never laughed as hard as I did through the second season. This is one of the most fat positive shows I've ever watched!
18) Normal People - I haven't read the book that it's based on, and I only seemed to hear about the frustration people felt after reading the novel. But after I watched the show, I really wish people had also told me how hot it was. I may check out the book simply to see if it's filled with half the heat in the show.
19) Season two of The End of The F***ing World is pretty spectacular. I can’t tell you that it’s a pleasant or joyful show, but there was a lot for me to think about while watching these characters deal with their decisions and trauma.
20) Lost in Space - I'm a sucker for a show in space that makes me want to hold my breath through a lot of it while I also grow fond of the characters. I'm still impressed with the storytelling and production value and I'm trying to patiently wait for the third and final season.
21) Watchmen - I feel like watching this and then moving into Lovecraft Country might help people imagine a new future. Especially people who aren't feeling very hopeful especially when current events are distracting and preventing them from experiencing joy and hope.
22) Insecure - Season 4, Episode 8 is my all-time favourite. Really I think season 4 has been the best out of all of them.
23) Fleabag - So smart and so cringe-worthy funny.
24) Parasite directed by Bong Joon-ho - I caught myself thinking deeply about this movie again the other day and it's been months since I watched it.
25) Chernobyl - It's heavy and sad, but there are some hopeful moments that made me fall in love with humanity while also being abhorred by all the lies (and some of those distracting British accents amongst the actors who were supposed to be Russian or Ukrainian).
26) Ugly Delicious - It took a while for me to warm up to the concept, but my whole family is glad we stuck with it. We don't often talk about rewatching a series, but this one is at the top of that list. You'll get ideas for all the cooking you may be doing at home and great questions to ponder if you're complaining that you're bored.
27) The Kominsky Method - Both seasons make me laugh even though they're dealing with some tough topics and I adore the tender at times bromance between the two main characters.
28) The Break (original title La trêve) - It's one of the many foreign shows with subtitles that I seek out because it's filled with mystery, intrigue, thrills and complications that surprise me. I enjoyed both seasons.
29) Disclosure - I love a documentary that makes me think and want to watch it again almost as soon as I finish it.
30) Tales From the Loop - I could have easily devoured this series in one go (but a certain someone in my house made me wait for him). It's full of wonder and delight but it's also dark at times and oh so sad. I enjoy things that make me feel all my feels.
31) My Octopus Teacher - is the kind of documentary that I love. It's subtle but powerful and kicked me in my feels. It totally made me remember a book I loved when I was a kid, The Girl of the Sea of Cortez by Peter Benchley which I now want to revisit.
32) Lovecraft Country - The season finale was on Sunday, and I miss it already. Now I'll catch up on the podcast, Lovecraft Country Radio, which I purposely abandoned until the show was over so I could extend my enjoyment of the series. Watching this the last few weeks has been a brief counterbalance to a lot of the awfulness that Black people have endured (and are still enduring).
Alright, what have you read or watched from this list? What would you add? I'd love to hear about what you're watching and reading, or plan to, while we navigate these next few months.
Speaking from my own experience, taking the time to rest when you need to, or escape briefly into a book, movie or show is absolutely necessary so that you can continue to fight, love, protest, donate, vote and care for yourself, your friends, family, neighbours and community. Because you need to show up in these ways.
Thanks for welcoming these notes into your life. I enjoy writing them for you.
Be well and enjoy the rest of your day.
Don't forget to send me some of your own recommendations so I can check them out!
Olwen